Anyway, to that dash-ey - - - person, friend or not, thanks for your comments, and yea I agree with you that until I can let go of my bitterness can I forgive and hopefully forget.
Thing is, I know clearly when I am likely to forgive. I can feel it. In fact I don't like this unforgiving side of me. But it's definitely not now. Not when I am still within the control of these things.
And that is precisely why I am ranting all on the blog. So that I don't feel that much pain in real life. So that I can release without hurting anyone. And no matter what, life has to move on. And there certainly are things that only one can solve by oneself. Just as i ever once heard someone say, if there is no other way to go around things, you'll have to do it yourself. Self help.
I guess its just me… there are people that I can be real to, but I can never put down the inner barrier in me. I just can't show people the worst side of me. I always…most often, rather, look happy and carefree to everyone. True, some friends know that I have been dealt with blows after blows, but they know I always take things by myself.
Which becomes what I am feeling now… come to think of it. BUT no, it's just not me to do that. They know I am hurt, but they just don't know what and how deep
No comments:
Post a Comment